Work Update

Oh my gosh, I just had the best conversation with my boss. It was uplifting and completely unexpected. Oh, and something I totally needed.

Background, I have a direct (woman) and an indirect Boss (man). My entire pregnancy the man was way more understanding than the woman- she has never been PG, doesn't have any kids. Not an excuse, just giving you background. Anyhow, as I am going over what I want to do about continuing to work, wanting to stay home, I obviously decide I will tell my indirect boss first, instead of going to my direct boss, who would then take it up. So I did that last Thursday. He was completely understanding and I asked him NOT to tell her, cause I see her on a daily basis and didn't want to deal with the non-understanding attitude! So he doesn't.

But yesterday (monday) comes to me to see where my thoughts are... I cannot travel, so I really have no choice other than he was going to see if I could switch positions with someone who works on retail ads. Been there, done that, equals late late hours, and OT during holidays, etc. So, I said that wouldn't really be any better for me than the travel. He tells me he will need a proper notice, I say let me talk to my Husband, and I will let him know on Wednesday. So, after our phone call, because I am starting to feel guilty that I owe it to my direct boss, and because I know another co-worker ran to tell my direct boss after overhearing my conversation, I decide to go in and tell her myself. Let's just say disaster!!! She is completely unprofessional, and after the talk, I get more and more annoyed and frustrated.

Fast Forward to this morning, my indirect boss calls me (he knows I am frustrated about my talk with direct boss) to see how I am feeling. I tell him I am going to go ahead and give him notice today, and that I will give 5 weeks, however, if direct boss makes the next 5 weeks uncomfortable, I will not work those entire 5 weeks. Well, we get into the subject of staying home and how making that decision was SOO hard for me. He was a single Dad of 3 children back in the day. He was saying how this industry is really not conducive to raising a family. I agree. He happens, to say to me, "And if you are worried about the money"... and I say, "I AM" he says "Don't" He says when he started having kids his wife and him made the exact same amount of money, and she quit so their pay was cut in half.. which is pretty much the same case with DJ and I. He said they got by. He said it was hard, but they did it. And he said that was some of their best times. *smile* This is all stuff that I know in my deepest of hearts would be the case, but yesterday after being close to giving notice, I was starting to doubt. He has told me repeatedly that my work record is perfect, and I would certainly be a candidate for re-hire. I asked him not taking into consideration the market, how easy he thinks it is for a someone who left the workforce to raise kids, to get back into it 5 years later, and he said, "I know for a fact it is, infact a good friend of mine who is a hiring manager said that right now their number 1 candidates for hire are Moms coming back from the home." I asked why, and I can't remember his exact words right now but basically he said, they have made the hardest decision, to stay home and raise their kids, and that is some of the hardest work. They are running their households, oh, he said the word DEDICATED- meaning they appreciate returning to the workforce, and they are by nature more dedicated people to whatever it is they do, raising the kids, working out of the home. (HMMP, to all of those who think staying home is a weak thing!!) He continues to tell me how hard it really is. He says you will have some hard days, you are home talking to kids all day long, and your hubby will come home tired from talking to adults all day. You are gonna want to talk, he is not going to want to talk. I chuckled and told him that is a normal day in my household... DJ NEVER wants to talk. He laughed. I feel like I am not doing this conversation justice for how important it was. How much it made me feel GOOD and confident in my decision. Oh, I had also told him how it WAS a very hard decision. And also, choosing to be dependant on a man, which is why I went to college, to be sure I could make a living for myself. He told me I would be fine. He said his ex-wife did not go to college, and that once they were divorced, yes she had it rough, because she could not find a good paying job. He also mentioned a friend he had that was recently divorced. She did go to college and had a career, which she left when she had her first baby. She is now recently a widow. After being out of the workforce for 18 years!! She had to work to support her family, and to put her last Child through college, he said that after 18 years she got a job she loves, and is decent paying and she is having no problem putting her Child through college. PHEW! That made me feel better. And ties into something an old college friend said to me yesterday, don't think of it as giving up your dreams and hopes, you are only putting that on hold! I felt great hearing that from her yesterday, and she is right, and he is right. When I want to, if I need to, I will find something that will work for me. That drive that I always have will be there again to get me out of any situation I am in.

I feel like this whole post is one entire run on sentance, or that is how it is running through my head right now.